I couldn’t make this up if I tried… (And I really did want to take a selfie at the polling station…) Today in Pennsylvania there was a primary election, and coincidentally I had the day off from work. I spent a few minutes at a… let’s say, a church (I don’t want to get anyone in trouble) yeah, a church… let’s say, somewhere in Berks County… why not… operating as a polling station for the voters for the day’s primary. The officials said it was a long, boring day so far, and one said he was ready for a nap and wished he could go home. I jokingly said, “Go ahead. I’ll fill in for a while.”
Seconds later, a woman comes in with some official looking documents asking for the Judge of Elections – who points at me. The lady with the paperwork, who I thought at first was there for a routine inspection or something, turned out to be an angry, loud lawyer who felt that voters were being unfairly stopped from bringing paraphernalia on candidates (printed by the local political parties and handed out to sway voters outside) inside the voting area when, she said, there’s no law against it.
I think if the voters don’t flaunt the printed materials, and carry it concealed to the voting booth to review it as they make their decision, it’s OK – but not to show it and influence others regarding who they should vote for. Why anyone undecided with no existing opinion would bother to come in to vote in a primary, I can’t imagine… But what do I know?
That’s the point, what do I know – I’m just an innocent bystander… fortunately the election officials only pretended I was in charge for a second before making some phone calls and taking aggressive lawyer lady outside… And before I left a police officer had come in (possibly called in response to aggressive lawyer lady, who was gone already) and sat down and started eating donuts brought in for the election officials… leading to some “cops eating donuts” jokes… which segued into comments on clean hands, kids with strep throat, and the strep throat virus “hiding in dogs’ anuses” and being repeatedly spread and reinfecting kids from the family pets licking faces and butts…
It was like a scene from a sit-com, with the donut eating cop and the election official talking about dog anuses, surreal and almost perfect for an episode of Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia or Seinfeld or something. I must have walked in at the absolute best time for maximum entertainment.