An article on Casual Sex and whether or not it is working out well for women appeared yesterday on digg.com under the name Lux Alptraum.
The essence of the article seemed to be in the last two paragraphs:
“Whatever the dominant relationship model may be, women always seem to be the ones losing out. Whether we’re proving our purity by not having sex, or proving our easygoing attitude by always being DTF, [*Down To F**k] it’s the compulsion to adjust our sexual behavior to meet society’s expectations, rather than our own sexual desires, that’s actually damaging. Women are taught to use sex as a tool to achieve social capital, rather than an end unto itself. It’s this conditioning that has us set up to fail no matter what game we’re playing.
So as cuffing season [*temporarily high desire to become couples for the holidays] kicks into high gear, take a step back and think about what you want, rather than what you’ve been told you’re supposed to want. It’s simple advice, but it’s true. If casual sex is making you happy, by all means, keep the party rolling. And if it’s leaving you unfulfilled, consider the many other sex and relationship options out there. But whatever you do, don’t fall into a pattern of behavior just because you’re supposed to.”
What I see in this is that for many women, casual sex is about doing what we want and not doing what we’re supposed to do. Such behavior rarely leads to good long term results, and in this case what it leads to is the glorification of promiscuous sex, making it even easier for the best looking people to shun responsibility for fun – while marginalizing all the beta types who would make a great wife or husband because – no one is encouraged to look for that (except for a brief window of time at the holidays for cuffing) or offer that.
Where has this culture glorifying meaningless hot sex for its own sake gotten us as a culture? The way I see it, it has led to LESS happiness and satisfaction, more women stuck in dead end jobs they don’t like “to be independent” – more cheating and infidelity (would Ashley Madison have been allowed to exist 60 years ago?) with high divorce rates and low reproductive rates.
Getting back to Lux’s story of how casual sex is working out for women (and men) it seems to be working out like almost anything where instant gratification takes precedent over long term needs – because while young women can get lots of sex, older women increasingly lack the support network of a spouse and children. Is the suggestion that those are good things just the outdated nostalgia of a caveman?
My conservative rantings are based on the article: